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Closet Nas Fan

Written by: 0-T on June 30th, 2002



Bleek: you seem to be only concerned with dissin women, were you abused as a child, scared to smile... they called you ugly? HAHAHA Holla!

*Bleek, getting into the moment, lets the rhythm take over and does the Harlem Shake. He then crosses his legs & spins around like a Temptation. On his second spin, he notices Jay-Z in the doorway*

Jay: *stone cold expression*

Bleek: *surprised* Hov! Uh, Mr. Carter.... what up

Jay: *stone cold expression*

Bleek: It's not what it looks like. I... I'm bootlegging that faggot's CD. I-- I was just making sure the CD-Rs play on the stereo.. cause you know how sometimes they play on the computer, but--

Jay: Bleek...

Bleek: Nah man, I swear. I was just making sure it played.

Jay: Bleek, silence. You really leave me with no other choice.

Bleek: *gets on his knees* PLEASE JAY! You gotta believe me! I hate that nigga, I was just tryin to bootleg his shit. I was doin it for you!


-- Beanie Sigel walks in --


Beans: Ayo Bleek... oh, what up Jay? Bleek, your sister's on line 2. She wanna know when you gonna return her Nas CD.

Bleek: *looks at Jay, nervously* Uh... right... tell her that I'm almost done making all the bootleg copies. *winks at Beanie* I'll give it to her tonight.

Beans: Cool... *talks into the phone* Uh... she wants to know when you're gonna bring back her 'Word Up!' fold out poster with Nas licking his lips.

Bleek: what??

Jay: *stone cold expression*

Bleek: Aw Jay, I don't know nothin about no Nas poster. Beans, hang up!

Beans: She said she wants this one back in good condition... the last one had wrinkles and stains on it.

Bleek: Man what?? HANG UP, MAN! HANG UP!

Jay: *shakes head*


-- Dame Dash walks in from the side door, holding a phone --


Dame: (in a little girl's voice) Yeah, Beanie... tell him I want my Nas pillow case back too... and my Nas trading cards.

Jay and Beans: hahahahaha

Bleek: MAN, FUCK Y'ALL! See that's why I don't fuck with y'all niggas like that. Y'all play too fuckin much!



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